“You’ll never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of your success is found in your daily routine.” — John C. Maxwell
Lindsay wrote an (in my humble opinion) important post a couple of months ago about the significance of creating your consistency in your voice/communication practice. In this post she made a crucial point: voice and communication training can’t only happen in the classroom or with a coach if you really want life-long change. Skills and techniques have to be practiced consistently on your own if you really want to instill permanent shifts.
Why? Because when you are working on your voice, you are facing strong habits that are deeply instilled in your body’s muscle memory. For the voice to truly change, it requires a process of consciously changing those habits. We are the first to admit: changing habits is hard. As Rob Gilbert says: “First we form habits, then they form us.”
In my experience, changing habits doesn’t happen with a quick fix. It’s a process. At first, this process can feel daunting, but if you stick to it, the process itself is the reward, and you may make new discoveries you were never intending to make along the way.
This post is for everyone who is afraid of or feels overwhelmed by the “process.” It’s especially for my students who ask me after only a short time of working together (or even in our first session), “How can I change my voice without having to think about it?” My answer is— you can’t. But you can reap tremendous rewards by becoming conscious about your voice use (or becoming conscious, in general!). To illustrate the benefits of process, I would like to share with you a snippet of my own story.
My whole life, I’ve wanted to be an actress (except for my very early years, when I wanted to be a teacher— see how things come full circle?). I was very impatient about it. I got my BA in theatre at an institution in the States that had very little voice or movement training. I moved to New York immediately after graduating, and wanted success now now now. I felt tremendous social and financial pressure to be a successful working actress, to prove to everyone that I was good enough to be in this profession. But because of my lack of vocal and movement training, I didn’t have the chops. I had some good instincts, but I didn’t have enough of a relationship with my body, and my voice was tight and couldn’t carry in large spaces. A little voice in my heart kept saying that if I really wanted this, I was going to have to go back to school. This was extremely distressing, as it disrupted my plan of having success NOW. It felt like too much of a hurdle to jump— to disrupt the life I was building in New York to go back to school. So instead, I started making small changes, in manageable bites. Here was the progression:
I had always hated working out. I have never been very flexible and had bad memories of breathing problems when I was in school physical education classes, so I used to avoid working out because it brought up memories of shame and inadequacy. However, because I didn’t work out or have any kind of movement training, I had no relationship with my body. This meant that in rehearsals, even if I had a strong mental connection to the characters I was playing, I struggled to embody them. A teacher I was working with at the time told me— if you are serious about acting, you have to cultivate a relationship with your body.
I started slowly— with a few stretches every morning, no more than about 5 minutes. I realized quickly that those 5 minutes were making a huge difference to the rest of my day. So I increased that time to a 20-minute pilates video every morning. Twenty minutes is a lot to add to your morning routine, but within a few weeks I couldn’t imagine my mornings without this time. It was the time I woke up, came into my body, and set the tone for the rest of my day. My interest in mind-body connection eventually led me to yoga, which, thanks to technology and youtube channels, I practice now almost daily. This consistent practice has completely revolutionized my life. I went from a person who had no connection to her body to, through mindful, consistent, incremental practice over several years, has a daily habit of connecting to herself physically. I successfully made this shift by choosing a kind of work out that I love, that makes me feel good. I truly enjoy my yoga practice, so I look for ways of fitting it into my day.
This connection with my body made me increasingly aware of my disconnection with my voice. I began taking voice classes on my own, and perhaps like some of you, I hoped that things would magically change in class. Luckily, I had good teachers who were insistent that I find a way of making this work my own— of practicing at home. Based on my previous experience with building a work out routine, I knew I needed to start small, then build. I also knew that I needed to find a kind of voice work that I enjoyed, so that it wouldn’t feel like a chore. For me, that’s Fitzmaurice Voicework(R). I started practicing 5/10 minutes a day, but because I enjoyed the work so much, that time continued to grow, and again, I looked actively for ways to make that practice a part of my daily routine. In fact, I became so enamored with the changes I was noticing, that, in the end, I did uproot my whole life to go back to school— but for something different than I originally intended. I moved to London to train to be a voice teacher.
What started as small, incremental changes to my daily routine led eventually to a whole life shift. This kind of growth could only happen because I stuck to and trusted my process. When I talk about it in hindsight, it all seems very rosy. But the process is always filled with struggle and pitfalls. Struggle and pitfalls are an important part of learning— and I am learning that struggle is often the step before a big discovery— an important part of the process to move through, rather than to avoid, if I want to get to the next step.
So that is my story. To sum it up, if you want to change something in a big way, start small. Think about something you can add to your daily routine, and then stick to it and watch what grows. It may take you in a totally different direction than you ever intended. What a delightful surprise that could be!
Please let us know what steps you are taking in your daily routine, and what your struggles and triumphs are. We would love to start a dialogue with you. Let’s make process cool again!
Christine & Lindsay